06 September, 2011

My Baby Boy is a Freakin' Preschooler

Is that title too aggressive?  Maybe so, but I'm in the midst of having a twenty-something crisis.  I have a son.  Who is in pre-school.  Shut.  Up.

Obviously we had to start the day with a mother-son photo shoot.  We'll be ready for the cover of Balboa Bay in no time.

Do you like Milo's last expression?  I think I'll call that his "pervin' face".  Because that's what I imagine people who are acting perverted look like.  Wouldn't you agree?

Here we are, waiting in the valet line (yeah, our school has valet, SUCKERS) with Milo holding his tuition.  I told him they would lock him in a cage and force him to do un-fun things if he didn't give them the ransom.  Nothing like putting the fear of God in your 3 year old on his first day in a new place with complete strangers.

And finally, Mrs. Wendling.  This woman was overly excited that Milo brought some classroom supplies.  I have never seen someone so excited for paper cups, aluminum foil and napkins.  But I guess we all have our thing.  (Mine is nail clippings.  And flesh body suits.)  Anywho, off they went to have a magical day full of learning.

You'll have to excuse the poor quality photos.  It's hard to get your settings right when you're turned halfway around in the driver's seat, still buckled, AND yelling at your kid to not take drugs.  Hey, it's never to early to keep your kids off the pipe and the pole.  

When we went back to pick him up Milo got right up in my business and told me, "I ATE A COOKIE!"  Almost like it was contraband.  What a rebel!  Based on the statement alone, because that's all he would talk about, I assume it was a good first day.  Mrs. Wending look like she needed a drink, and I would have offered her one but my flask was near empty and my morning cocktail was wearing off.  

I never understood why parents got so excited for the first day of school until this morning.  It's quite addictive, leaving your kid to go learn and explore while you do things that don't involve 4000 potty breaks or discussions on why it's not kind to smother your sister under a mountain of pillows.  My only question is, when can I leave Luie too? 


  1. I AM legit. True story.

    And I have a toddler who should be starting preschool, but I was too afraid to send him. Mommyfail.

  2. How did this even happen? I ask myself all the time when Anna can start going to some kind of Mother's Day Out program.


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